A Meditation on Personal Growth: I'm Worth It
By Melissa M. Messina
When I was a child, physical growth was easy. I simply finished everything that was put on my plate, even if it was (Ugh!) liver; always took my vitamin and never, ever forgot to brush after every meal. I did all these things because I lived in fear of having my growth stunted, of not becoming as tall as I could be. Every once in a while when I measured myself against the black marks I had drawn on my bedroom wall and I found that the top of my head measured higher than the highest black mark, I knew that I had grown, making everything that I had had to do worth it. Now I am finished with physical growth. I am as tall as I'm ever going to be, and I'm definitely no longer a child. Yet I still have another stage of growth on which to embark, one with which I will never be completely finished. Unfortunately, this new stage of personal growth is not as easy as physical growth; in fact, it is downright difficult. There are no prescribed methods I can follow, no vitamins I can take to help me to grow correctly. There is only what I can pick up and learn along the way. I must learn to like myself no matter how hard it is at times. I must learn to trust in others as well as to believe in myself. I must learn to not feel guilty every time I feel I've disappointed myself or someone else. I must learn to take risks so I can have the chance to say this is what is, instead of this is what could have been. I must also learn to manage my time to balance the time between work and play effectively, avoiding burnout. Of course none of these things is easy, but my failure to accomplish them, just like failing to finish everything on my plate, could severely stunt my emotional growth. It will always be a rough journey, yet looking back over those imaginary black marks signifying the steps of my personal growth, I note how the top of my head reaches just a little bit higher than the highest black mark. This makes the risks I've taken seem worthwhile.
